āmāra jīvana, sadā pāpe rata,
nāhiko puṇyera leṣa
parere udvega, diyāchi ye koto,
diyāchi jīvere kleśa
भावार्थI am an impious sinner and have caused others great anxiety and trouble.
Vaishnav Bhajan
Amar Jivan
Composed by Bhaktivinoda Thakura
nija sukha lāgi’, pāpe nāhi ḍori,
dayā-hīna svārtha-paro
para-sukhe duḥkhī, sadā mithya-bhāṣī,
para-duḥkha sukha-karo
भावार्थI have never hesitated to perform sinful act for my own enjoyment. Devoid of all compassion, concerned only with my own selfish interests, I am remorseful seeing others happy. I am a perpetual liar, and the misery of others is a source of great pleasure for me.
āśeṣa kāmanā, hṛdi mājhe mora,
krodhī, dambha-parāyaṇa
mada-matta sadā, viṣaye mohita,
hiṁsā-garva vibhūṣaṇa
भावार्थThe material desires within the core of my heart are unlimited. I am wrathful, devoted to false pride and arrogance, intoxicated by vanity, and bewildered by worldly affairs. Envy and egotism are the ornaments I wear.
nidrālasya hata, sukārye virata,
akārye udyogī āmi
pratiṣṭha lāgiyā, śāṭhya-ācaraṇa,
lobha-hata sadā kāmī
भावार्थRuined by laziness and sleep, I resist all pious deeds; yet I am very active and enthusiastic to perform wicked acts. For worldly fame and reputation I engage in the practice of deceitfulness. Thus I am destroyed by my own greed and am always lustful.
e heno durjana, saj-jana-varjita,
aparādhi nirantara
śubha-kārya-śūnya, sadānartha-manāḥ,
nānā duḥkhe jara jara
भावार्थA vile, wicked man such as this, rejected by godly people, is a constant offender. I am such a person, devoid of all good works, forever inclined toward evil, worn out and wasted by various miseries.
bārdhakye ekhona, upāya-vihīna,
tā’te dīna akiñcana
bhakativinoda, prabhura caraṇe,
kore duḥkha nivedana
भावार्थNow in old age, deprived of all means of success, humbled and poor, Bhaktivinoda submits his tale of grief at the feet of the Supreme Lord.